Bored of the balding guy in the from of the room make bad jokes about mitochondrial DNA? Try these tips for spicing up your time in the lecture hall.
1. Google pictures of pandas with flamethrowers.
2. Watch some prepubescent kid do “Awesome Tricks With A Zippo.”
3. Watch porn (no links to this one, sorry… I think you just might be able to find it on your own).
4. Make a Big Mac from scratch.
5. Read random pages on Wikipedia [hit alt-shift-x]. (Hey, did you know that the Langlands program is a web of far-reaching and influential conjectures that connect number theory and the representation theory of certain groups?)
6. Make porn.
7. Buy random things on the cheap.
8. Form a Marxist paramilitary group. (“Subsequently, get arrested” can fall under this category too.)
9. Make pointless arguments with people on the Internet.
10. Write reviews of porn.
11. Watch Russian women kick the **** out of each other after a sporting event.
12. Translate random text into various languages.
13. Watch that Duke Nukem Forever trailer from 2001… and wonder what could have been.
14. Read steamy text-based lawyer porn.
15. Write pointless blog posts that no one will read anyway.
*excluding, of course, actually listening to the class.
I hesitantly look forward to doing #3 and then #10 after you do #6.
Also, as point #15 has now been invalidated, I demand a new set of 15 things to do, due around this time Thursday, perhaps after a similar lecture.
#14 trumps them all.
I don’t think 15 is enough, dom.