27.12.08
[ed. note–this was the inspiration for this blog.]
i write more than i eat
thrice a day i poeticize
put words to paper to humanize emotion
but in all the subtlety of this poet
he can’t seem to find the words to describe himself
he unmuzzles his emotions,
uncorks the Cristal bottle and pours himself out
into this champagne glass made of wood pulp and recycled fiber
but he never gets the right pour
someone cut a hole in the bottle
and it’s now spilling onto the floor
quick, get a rag
and clean it up
because those words are too complex
to break it down
language can be beautiful
my words dance on the page
but stand awkwardly off it
like the fat boy at the high school party
too scared to ask the fat girl to dance
because he’s been rejected more times than he’s eaten today
endurance comes from carbohydrates
but he’s burnt them all
being burnt by
the girls with tricolored purses
embedded with hearts and filled with condom wrappers
so instead he stands in a corner
trying to muster the strength to speak up
but he hasn’t had his verbal pasta today
when he finally finds his voice
he realizes
the dj stopped spinning.
the disco lights stopped glowing.
the room is empty.
like him.
language is beautiful
the passive voice
is more my voice
than my own
because i’m passively aggressive
actively progressing ends in regression.
i’m no stat major,
but when i analyzed that regression
i found a causal link
between pretty words and pretty voices
but not pretty words and pretty choices
the choice is yours
the voice is mine
language is beauty
i can’t re-form
when i was never formed
in the first place
formulate me
the hardest part of beauty
is knowing
it’s in your mind
yet not knowing
where to look.